What you shouldn’t do when toilet training

Now you think I would know how to do it after training 4 kids. You would think after lecturing people, yes I do believe I lecture people in regard to toilet training, I would know what not to do. Well, I’m here to tell you with baby number 5 I have broken almost every one of my toilet training rules.

I had a friend today say I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. I should be ok with the fact that at almost 2 he’s going to the toilet at home. Oh, believe me I am very happy about that. I’m not happy that I am too scared this time to let him go without nappies to the shops, playgroup, friends’ houses, in the car, anywhere. Why is that?

Since forever I have lectured my friends and their friends and told them, “Don’t put them back in nappies. You just send them backwards.” I know. I’ve seen it in my friend’s kids. I know what I’m doing is stupid and has long term consequences. I know it is only prolonging the whole terrible experience that is toilet training. Trust me. I KNOW.

I’ve had kids wee in their sibling’s classroom. I’ve had wee on the floor in the supermarket. I’ve had accidents on carpets at playgroup and on the couch at home. I’ve had wee in the carseat and the pram. I’ve dealt with this for basically 5.5 years. What is wrong with me this time?

My friend today said, “It’s not like he’s going to go to kindy wearing a nappy.” I know. I know I shouldn’t let this get to me. I guess it will eat away at me until I can finally bite the bullet and do this properly. The way I have told everyone else to toilet train their kids.  I also know without a doubt this is my problem and not his. I know he is capable of going in public without wetting and I know even if he does it’s not the end of the world. I know the problem. I’m lazy.

This has been my whole argument over the years regarding other people not toilet training their kids early like I have. It comes down to what’s important and right now it is not important enough for me to make him go to the toilet in public and deal with the accidents so I’m being lazy. Yes, I’m being lazy. I know I am and it is not something I like to associate with myself. I am being lazy because I know he can do it. He’s been going to the toilet or potty for more than 6 months now. I guess I have to get myself in the mindset to toilet train him for the public.

Gifted children

We have thought for a while our lovely little Jessica is a gifted child. She has spoken well from a very young age, speaking in full sentences since she was 18 months old and singing nursery rhymes from an even earlier age. Last term we attended Jessica's prep interview.  We have been tossing up the idea of early entry to year 1 for a while now but the cost of the tests and the process seemed a little too much for us considering it isn't up to the school to approve the early entry but the district director who will never actually meet her. I took a school library book of Hollie's the interview and Jessica read it while we waited. Hollie, year 1, borrows from the year 3 section of the library at her teacher's request. The deputy principal doing the interview wasn't so impressed with a nearly 5 year old reading at an 8 year old level as it is quite common for girls especially to read early but she was impressed when we showed her Jessica's writing and spelling. She sat up and was visibly shocked by what she saw. Couple her literacy level with her numeracy levels there is no way she will cope with prep. She will be bored out of her brains. The deputy was the one who suggested we do an early entry. We didn't have to say anything. I didn't want to be one of those parents marching in there and telling the school how amazing my kid was.

This is Jessica's story about going to the football in May. At the time she was 3& 1/2 months shy of 5. I had to help her spell Giants and fence. She did the rest herself. She even remembers the colours of the seats we sat in.

I know almost every parent thinks their kid is very bright or skilled with a particular thing. I have many friends who insist their kids are very bright, above average, gifted even. When I look at Jessica who was reading Hollie's prep readers when she was 3 and reading them with the top readers in prep I know Jessica is gifted. This was confirmed last week when the school's Guidance Officer did an intelligence test on Jessica to support our application to early entry to year 1. Jessica was tested and came out as having "Superior intelligence" as her results were in the 95 percentile which means only 5% of children her age are smarter than her. 

Then I think about Hannah who is 3.5 years old and created her own perfectly stamped and punched birthday card for her cousin and wrote the entire card by herself and I wonder about Hannah too. Hannah's card to Gemma read, "To Gemma love and hugs Hannah" which she needed help spelling "love" and "hugs" but was able to work out the letters when I sounded them out except the e on love. She was most proud that she could now write a G all by herself. I have not taught her to write. I have written a lot with her, labelling pictures, writing on the fridge, just general mum stuff. We have read a lot and she picks up words all the time. Tonight we had a book that had "we" on every page and by the end she knew which word was we. I'll see if she remembers it tomorrow. She is so curious about writing and reading and spelling at the moment that we just explore together. I don't teach her. I don't think I do anything special with them. I give them my time. We share and have fun together (most of the time, I'm not a perfect Mum- far from it. Yes, I yell at my kids, I'm not angel.) The children have learnt through example, time and exposure. Maybe this is what mums did in a previous era. Is it possible that the time I spend with them and not the money I spend on gadgets or educational toys that has made the difference? I really don't know. What I do know though is they have a love of learning. Hopefully I can continue to foster that in them and they carry that into their adult lives.

This story is amazing to me because at 5 she knew the difference between slid and slide all by herself. 

Hopefully we'll find out at the end of this week whether the district director has approved the application. I know that if he doesn't she is going to be a huge strain on the teachers next year. I think even if she is advanced her teachers will have to modify their work to be able to cater for her ability. It will be just the same as having a child with a disability in the classroom. Let's hope there is someone else of similar ability to be able to work with her.

38 weeks pregnant

This is my last baby and I'm getting to the stage where I'm actually thinking I will miss being pregnant. I know it is ridiculous to say such a thing when you experience pregnancy like I do, 18 weeks of morning/all night sickness, reflux, varicose veins, the list really just goes on and on but knowing this is the last time I will feel those wonderful kicks, even when they keep me awake all night or knock my ribs out while I'm driving, and feeling the wonder that is the life growing in me, is a little sad. I have been very blessed. I already have four beautiful girls and another babe growing and I know once it is born, with each milestone, with each loosening of the apron strings I will mourn a little.
I had to go into the birth suite during my midwife appointment on Monday because the baby had hardly moved since 6 am which is very unusual for it. They just wanted to check me out to make sure the baby and I were doing ok. It was a tad scary being in there. I have had 3 of my 4 babies in that hospital. None of the births, except maybe the casearean, were bad or left a horrible memory. I have had pretty straight forward births so far so it wasn't that. It was the memory of how painful birth actually is that was scary. I'm sure I don't really remember what it is like either. I'm sure if I did I wouldn't have signed up for it again. It is one of the worst things you go through but at least there is a wonderful prize at the end.
The prize, amazingly, keeps on giving, although to be honest it is fairly one way in the other direction most of the time. Over the weekend we were lucky enough to spend time with just Hollie and Lisa. Jessica and Hannah both spent 2 nights at their grandparents.We thoroughly enjoyed our time with Hollie because it gave us the opportunity to shower her in attention. I thought I would include some photos of our lovely time flying the kite.

We had lunch at Morgan's first and a play in the park. She's such a little poser but gosh she's cute.

Getting the kite to stay up when there's barely any wind is difficult but she did a pretty good job.

Lisa likes to be a big girl so carries around the backpack and wears anyone's shoes but her own.

What do you do with your kids to make them feel special? I know we will struggle a little in the first few months after the baby arrives as it is such an all consuming job - looking after a new born however because we already have so many children the baby just seems to fit into what everyone else is doing. Any tips to help us transition from 4 to 5?

Pregnancy week 32

It isn't long until the bundle of joy arrives. So soon in fact that I'm starting to have a little freak out. As yet the only thing I have prepared are the maternity pads. Yay go me. No cot, no clothes, no sheets or bunny rugs. No capsule organised for the car, no baby bag or hospital bag packed. There are under 8 weeks to go which means this bub could come any time in the next 8 weeks. Am I super relaxed about it or just an experienced mother who knows that really I can have anything I need brought to me in hospital and hubby can do the rest of the organising while I'm in hospital? I haven't any birth plan and have only just organised someone to pick up and take Jessica to kindy if I happen to be in hospital on kindy days. Now I'm starting to feel a little like it could be tomorrow or any day now so get a wriggle along woman.

I've also started to freak out about actually giving birth. Even though I know it's ok and that I'll be able to do it, it's the long, drawn out labours I don't want. Induce me like they did with Lisa and have it over and done with in 2 hours and I'll be fine. Put me through 18 hours of natural labour and I'm scared. Not scared but fearful of the pain. It's funny though, I know as soon as labour starts it's ok. You know that sense of calm and purpose that comes over you? Kevin will read this and ask what calm? but ladies you know what I'm talking about. I think the thought of it (once you've done it before) is worse than the actual labour and every contraction is one step closer to meeting that beautiful baby. Oh it's so wonderful. I can't wait.

Any of you in South East Queensland at the moment will know the horrible weather we've been having lately. It is the school holidays and it has rained all week. It is the middle of winter (well nearly as Jessica rightly pointed out we have to wait until we're half way through July to be the middle of winter) and winter is usually the dry season. This is crazy weather for us. Today I went to the shops and slipped over outside a shop and landed on my bottom. Two old ladies picked me up. I was very shaken by the experience because it really hurt my tummy. For the next 90 mins the baby didn't move at all. That is very unlike this baby. Naturally I was a little concerned but I took myself off to bed and although my tummy is still sore the baby is moving like it usually does. Ahh. That was my little adventure for the day. Stay tuned for the update on Hollie's birthday. She turn 6 tomorrow. How scary is that?

Another Longreach kindy kid

Here are some photos I meant to post back in term one. Jessica didn't get to start kindy until half way through the term because there weren't any places left. She had to wait until someone dropped out of kindy for her to get a place. We were delighted to recieve a phone call offering Jessica a spot at kindy. She didn't understand to start with because we'd spent close to 6 months telling her she wouldn't get to be a kindy kid this year but by the end of the day she understood that she would finally get to be a Longreach kindy kid and there would be no more hoping.
On her first day she didn't want her photo taken. I was a little sad. I wanted one of those posed kindy shots to put in her scrapbook. She wouldn't have a bar of it though. She was so excited to be a Longreach kindy kid, she barely said goodbye to us before taking part in the class. She didn't have any dramas and fitted in really well even though everyone else has been there for 6 weeks. She fitted in so well the teacher and the teacher aide had to keep reminding themselves that it was her first day/week and she didn't know all the rules and routines. It helps if your big sister was a kindy kid the year before.

Here are a few photos of her first day. First lot are her hiding from the camera. The second lot are her arriving at kindy.

Under 8s Day

Today we went to the Longreach State School for the Under 8s Day. There were heaps of kids there and lots of activities for everyone to do. The girls had heaps of fun. Jessica was a little overwhelmed to start with and Hollie wanted to go home when the emergency services cars arrived and the kids were allowed to turn on the sirens and honk the horns. Hollie was scared. Poor thing. We had to make playdough because Playgroup supplied the playdough activity. We made purple, Carley made pink and Trish made blue so when all the colours got mixed together as it does when kids play with it (I mean who else is going to play with it? Adults?) it made purple instead of brown or muck. Good thinking Trish.