Jessica's last few days

On Monday we had a bit of a terrible day with Jessica. It was the Queen's Birthday long weekend here so Kevin was home to make the girls' breakfasts. As a treat on the weekend Kevin will colour the porridge for the girls. He grabbed a different container of food dye on Monday. We paid for it later in the afternoon.

Jessica as a 20 month old had a reaction to strawberry milks and on Monday we had a repeat of those reactions. Our poor little girl was possessed. That's what it seemed like. She was crying uncontrollably, rubbing her feet together, hitting the ground, screaming, kicking the floor. This went on for almost 3 hours in total. This is totally unlike Jessica. I was so distressed. My heart was aching. What it is about being a Mum that you just can't turn off, that you feel that pain? I was on the verge of tears. I couldn't take it anymore. Kevin went to the pantry and looked at the ingredients in the two different food colouring containers. We will be steering clear of colouring 122 from now on. Kevin threw the contents down the sink. Meanwhile Jessica had fallen asleep in the position below, just like the last time she had this reaction. My poor, poor little girl.

Sometimes motherhood can be so challenging. What am I talking about? It is ALWAYS challenging. Challenging but also the most rewarding and meaningful thing I'll ever do. How wonderful is Jessica? This morning when I said I needed to vacuum the floor - with my silly, dodgy, still unfixed vacuum cleaner- I asked Jessica and Hannah to clean the lounge room floor. Jessica worked very hard until the floor was clean. She didn't have to be reminded what was expected. I didn't have to get cross. She did the job and encouraged Hannah to keep picking things up in a nice voice. Oh, how lovely is that?

It makes me feel great. Makes up for the way I left Hollie at school this morning but that is another story. I'll leave that one for tomorrow.

Thanks for stopping by.

Here's to parents

You know being a parent is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. I don’t care what anybody says, it is simply hard. Staying at home all day with young children is absolutely the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It is also the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done. People often say to me, “How do you do it? How do you manage with 4 kids?” I don’t know how I do it. I do it because there isn’t any other choice. As a mother you just do what you have to do.

A friend of mine had twins recently. Now there’s someone who you can say, “How do you do it?” to.  I am totally amazed by her.  She is feeding both of them and because they are small she has had to feed them more often. She is a first time Mum. Can you imagine the shock she would have had bringing them home? Can you remember the feeling of being overwhelmed when you brought your first baby home? Can remember the advice and the feeling of failure because you weren’t doing what was expected? The conflicting advice? (And I am guilty of giving unsolicited advice too. Sorry.) The goo - ing and gaa – ing that occurred when you first had the baby only to end when you really needed someone to help, to give you 10 minutes to have a shower or an hour to have a sleep? The complete tiredness from breastfeeding.  (Those people who say breast feeding isn’t draining surely had someone else supply the milk. It’s not only the getting up during the night but the physical drain of having to produce that milk.) So tired you can’t think properly? You remember that? I’ve got no idea how my friend is doing it.  Logically I know. She’s doing because she has to but even after 4 babies I don’t know I could handle it, that I’d know what to do. It amazes me what she is doing. I don’t even think she’s given a formula bottle in desperation. She is truly wonderful. She must be so tired and so drained.  I want to tell her it’ll get better but I don’t want to lie. It gets better but then the next problem will present itself.

Motherhood involves constant learning. I just don’t seem to be able to master it. Every one of my kids are different and they have each required different responses to situations. Hannah responds well to having her face in the corner of the naughty corner whereas Hollie is punished enough by just having to sit in it. Don’t send Jessica to her room as she enjoys the time alone in her bed too much. With the end of every phase of parenthood comes the beginning of the next phase with its own challenges. It is a wonderful experience this motherhood thing but gosh it’s hard. Some days when Kevin walks through the door after a hard day of being a high school teacher, I’d give anything to be the one in the work clothes but not this week.

On Tuesday I had to take Lisa to the hospital to get her cough and wheeze checked out. She hasn’t been feeding well. Her feeds have been short and the frequency has stayed the same. She’s lost weight which is a little scary. It may just be the different scales but 1.1kgs in 2 weeks is not good. 1.1 kgs is too big a difference for it to be the scales too. They have put her on antibiotics! I’ve never had a baby on medicine before. They also said her wheeze sounds like an asthma wheeze but they won’t diagnose that until they are 3 years old. She is worse in the mornings and evenings. The cold chill makes the wheeze louder. I’m just glad it was me there with her. My poor little baby.

So here’s to Mums and Dads everywhere. I hope you are all having a wonderful week and rejoicing in your wonderful and not-so-wonderful children. Here’s hoping you have wonderful friends like me, who looked after my kids and my ring ins while I took Lisa to the hospital and who provided morning tea and lots of chatting and mother talk this morning and made everything in life seem ok. Thanks. I don’t know what I would do without the knowledge that what I'm going through is normal, what my kids are doing is normal.

Here is Hollie last week performing her shark song on parade. She was fantastic. I'm glad I'm the Mum who stays home so I'm able to attend all of her school events. I'd hate to miss it because I'm working. Poor Kevin always misses out. I'm a very lucky lady.

Who wants to be a parent?

I have been feeling very overwhelmed all day. All week and probably for a little longer to be honest. I feel as though I'm constantly chasing my tail. My house looks like a bomb site CONSTANTLY, I'm cranky, I'm tired and I feel as though there is no time for me. I know I'm a Mum. I know this is my life at the moment but is there an end?
I swore at the washing machine today and then realised how irrational I was being and cried. Admittedly I did feel better after I'd cried a little but I didn't have time to cry either because I had to get Jessica to kindy and Hollie and the girls from next door to school. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know why it's all become too much all of a sudden.
The ladies at playgroup were quite shocked by my attitude today because I was obviously not coping with life all that well this morning. I think I usually have everything under control and this week or these last few weeks everything has become a bit much and they noticed. One of the suggestions was my lack of exercise. I had a Lletz procedure done last week and the gyno said no exercise for a month. I think he was being a little over cautious but I don't want to be out of action for longer because of my stupidity in over doing it too. Having got into the swing of exercise it's really difficult not to exercise. I also know I operate a lot better if I am able to have some time to myself every day before the family gets up and in my face as children usually do in the mornings when they are demanding breakfast and there is the hustle and bustle of getting everyone ready for school and kindy. I haven't had that time for over a week now. Maybe the ladies have a point.

During some down time today I read this post and decided it is kind of ok my house looks horrible. My kids have a lovely life. We have lots of laughs and cuddles and so many good times together. That's truly a positive.

I mean look at this photo. Cheesy grin I know but she was having fun with me out in our yard one afternoon recently. This makes it all ok.

But then you get this.

Hannah pulling every item of clothing out of her cupboard. No point ironing her clothes. Look at all the wasted time I spent ironing that pile of mess.

And the fights we have to have to get her to sleep in clothes in winter for her to just take them off again when she gets to bed.

Then this. Isn't that the cutest little Lions girl you ever did see?

And this is why we have so many dramas with Hannah. She is one cheeky little monkey. Don't you just love that grin?

Then you get the firsts like this.

Hollie's first athletics carnival. She hasn't quite mastered her mother's running style. She came last in this sprint. She spent the first half of the race looking around at all her friends. 2nd last for the youngest kid at school. I'm so proud of her though. She had a heap of fun too.

Then came the ball games.

 So much fun.

Then came the high jump. Not really following in my footsteps but that's ok. Look at her face. Pure joy. That's what I want to see.

So there is joy in this thing called parenting. It's just that sometimes it's a little hard to remember the good. A simple look through the photos on the computer will always help.

A Birthday to celebrate

It was Kevin's birthday yesterday. We had a very lovely relaxing day. I made his favourite dinner a sponge cake. This year I also picked his present all by myself. I got him a barrometer. He loves it and keeps checking the temperature because that's pretty much all that changes around here. Here are some pics of our day.

Unwrapping his locomotive from the girls. A Farish B1.

We always do presents in our bed. Jessica is giving Lisa a cuddle.

The sponge I made for him.

Hannah enjoyed the food as always. These are her Tim Tam hands.

Jessica and I played on the floor and Kevin took some photos of us. She blows me away with her beauty.

Lisa found the day very exhausting and fell asleep on the floor.

There are a few photos taken of Hollie but they aren't very good. I'm glad Kevin had a lovely day. I love sharing his birthday with him.

Wonderful Weather

Here are a few photos of the family taken last weekend. It has finally cooled down enough to go outside and enjoy being outside without feeling as though you're going to melt. I love this time of year althogh the mornings are getting a little chilly but it heats up quickly but only reaches the high 20s or low 30s. It is just lovely.

I can't wait to get back into my blog. Really going to make an effort. Gosh I say that a lot don't I?

I bought this out door setting for the kids years ago from Vinnies and they have had so much use.

Hollie enjoying a swing.



The beautiful girls in their hair towels.



Grandpuff with his youngest and eldest granddaughters.

My exercise

Bootcamp had its last session this morning. Now what to do?

I need to have some kind of committment to keep it all up. I find getting to the gym quite difficult. Oh I can't imagine why with 4 kids?  A friend told me about this site The Rage Within and I was thinking of giving it a go. I thought it was quite achievable. I mean who can't do 50 elevated push-ups a day? Well me probably with my shoulder but I can  easily crank out 23 normal boy push ups without any problem. Feeling pumped and I want to keep it up.

Prior to the commencement of bootcamp



After the first session. Not the best photo of me but one which indicates how hard I worked.



After 6 weeks of hard yakka this is the result. A fitter, stronger, healthier me.

Only 3.5kgs lost but you should feel those muscles. Here's to a fitter, stronger, healthier, happier body.

Another week begins

We have been so hectic since school started. Not only are there my 4 kids to look after but I've also taken on Ted and Rosie for a four hours on Monday and Tuesday each week and picking up and dropping off of the neighbours' kids every day except Monday and Tuesday mornings. Once all these responsibilities are taken care of there isn't much time left in the day.

Hollie has been extremely tired because of her energetic learning days and so have Kevin and I. We at least don't cry at the drop of a hat but then maybe we should. It's probably better than being grumpy. It isn't just the tiredness from school. Hollie has attended two parties this week which adds to the red eyes.

 Here is a shot of Hollie and Kevin having their Sunday sleep. Hollie who hasn't had a regular day time sleep since she was 18 months old has one every Saturday and Sunday.

Jessica has taken to climbing the tree in the back yard. I took these photos of her the other day after she had climbed quite high.

I think she is just beautiful and really think her kindness is visible in those stunning eyes of hers.